 Emotional regulation—the ability to understand, express, and manage emotions in healthy ways—isn’t something we’re born knowing. It’s a learned skill, and often, in African American families, it’s one we’re not taught explicitly. Many of us were raised with “what happens in this house, stays in this house,” or told to “suck it up” instead of processing pain. But the truth is, teaching emotional regulation at every age is one of the most powerful tools we can offer ourselves, our siblings, our children, and our communities.
For toddlers, it looks like helping them name their feelings. “You’re mad because your toy broke.” Language gives children power. For teens, it’s about helping them feel safe enough to express themselves without judgment—creating space where they can feel seen, even when they’re misunderstood. And for adults? It means unlearning old habits and developing new ones: pausing before reacting, setting boundaries, journaling, meditating, praying, going to therapy, or simply taking a walk to reset. As college students and young adults, we’re in a unique position. We are often healing from how we were raised while simultaneously learning how to do better—for ourselves and the generations to come. Emotional regulation isn’t just about keeping your cool. It’s about learning how to feel and function without shame or suppression. It’s about being able to disagree without disrespect. It's how we protect our peace and stay grounded in a world that can feel heavy. In the words of Audre Lorde, “Caring for myself is not self-indulgence, it is self-preservation.” Teaching emotional regulation at every age begins with us choosing to show up differently—soft when the world expects us to be hard, and strong in ways that don’t require us to suffer in silence. Healing is a family affair—and it starts with awareness.
0 Comments
 In today’s fast-paced world, finding balance between work, worship, and family can feel like an ongoing juggling act—especially in African American households where we often wear many hats. We are caretakers, breadwinners, community leaders, and culture bearers. And while we take pride in showing up for others, we can sometimes lose sight of ourselves—and of God—in the process.
The tension is real: how do you grind to secure the bag, stay rooted in your faith, and remain present with your family—without burning out? The answer isn’t perfection—it’s alignment. Balancing these areas starts with acknowledging that each plays a vital role in our overall well-being. Work provides stability and resources, but it shouldn’t consume us. Worship connects us to purpose, peace, and power. And family? That’s where love is lived out, lessons are passed down, and legacy is built. Set rhythms, not rigid routines. Maybe that looks like morning prayer before checking emails, setting aside one evening a week for uninterrupted family dinner, or honoring the Sabbath in whatever way restores your soul. When we begin to prioritize presence over performance, we allow space for God to lead the day—not our to-do list. Technology can help—but it can also hurt. Use it wisely. Block off time on your calendar for what matters most. Say “no” to what drains you so you can say “yes” to what fills you. And remember: balance doesn’t mean everything gets equal time—it means everything gets its proper attention. Some seasons may require more focus on career. Others, more care for family. But through it all, worship grounds us. It reminds us of who we are and where our strength comes from. At the heart of it, balance is about stewardship—of your energy, your time, and your relationships. You deserve a life that honors all of who you are. And with intention, prayer, and boundaries, that life is absolutely within reach. |
Archives
November 2025
Categories |
RSS Feed